I want a soundtrack playing really loud when I’m out in the streets. Sort of like in that Verve video for Bittersweet Symphony. Only cooler. Like a live version of Frontwards by Pavement or Debaser by Pixies. And everybody would hear it. Loud. They would understand that I meant business. Serious business. I want a magic poo stick I could weild like a bat. People would go flying when I made my way down the streets.
I want all the people in every city in the world to gather in townsquares and parks and jump up and down simultaniously. With their fists in the air. Shouting the chorus to Summer Babe. It would make the world a better place.
I wish I could give a copy of Return of The Rentals to Walker Texas Danger and his administration. Because you just don’t go invading countries after hearing Please Let That Be You.
The next time you want to punch someone. Kiss them. You might be surprised by the effect it has.
Naked is allways more fun when the clothes are on.
It would be sweet if everybody just did as I said. Sometimes I would say show me your breasts. What I would say the most would probably be; are we drinking or painting? Sheit, I had completely forgotten about that. Really?
I would settle for people doing what I said from time to time. Or that my plans would work 8 out 7 times.
If it’s true that statistics can prove anything and that people buy into them, I would make a graph that said be nice. And one that said kiss me. I’d show that one to girls I like.
I want to end world hunger just by doing nothing.
I don’t think it’s too much to ask to be recognised and hailed as the most brilliant person that ever lived. I’m not asking for much. A national holiday named after me. And my own brand of beer. People tossing flowers in front of my feet.
And you know how Superman can look through clothes. I would be able to do that.