by Jeremiah Griffey

QUESTION: Is it OK for any man to watch ?Gilmore Girls? when not being forced by a significant other?

ANSWER: Yes. But only if one of these three reasons apply:

1. You have a crush on Lauren Graham. (And even then it?s suspect unless combined with #2.)
2. You have watched the documentary ?Dig!? and are a fan of Joel Gion (Anton Newcombe?s goofball former tambourine man in the Brian Jonestown Massacre) who has a semi-reoccurring role on the show.
3. You are J. Mascis.

?We were coming to record the album and J. was watching Gilmore Girls,? says Witch vocalist/guitarist Kyle Thomas. ?We?re like, ?WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?!???

As he tells the story, Thomas laughs that wispy smoker?s laugh, the one that slowly fades in and out like a speaker on its last legs. That and raspy speaking voice betray the fact he?s the person singing those meteoric high notes on Witch?s debut self-titled album (Tee Pee). He laments the fact people compare him to Robert Plant. Mostly he sounds like a teenaged Alice Cooper or a prepubescent James Hetfield. But when he howls on ?Seer? you hear it.

Witch formed after Mascis and his friend Dave Sweetapple decided to start a hard rock band in the vein of Motorhead, Black Sabbath and Led Zeppelin. Sweetapple knew Thomas and Asa Irons from New England avant-folk collective Feathers through a business relationship with Surefire Distribution; they gladly joined the band.

?J. really wanted to play drums in a band?his Led Zeppelin cover band wasn?t really doing it for him, I guess,? Thomas laughs.

Thomas grew up and lives in Vermont, also known as home to ?free folk?-sters like Matt Valentine and Erika Elder. And listening to Feathers? debut self-titled album on Devendra Banhart?s Gnomonsong record label, it?s almost impossible to see how Thomas and Irons can have such split musical personalities.

?I wouldn?t necessarily call us folk guys. We?re not folk purists or anything like that. We listen to Motorhead all the time,? Thomas says. ?It was kind of bound to happen, for me at least, that I was gonna start a louder band. I kinda have the best of both worlds. I gotta be able to play loud too, because that?s where I came from.?

Given Mascis? turbulent interpersonal history with Lou Barlow (as detailed in the majority of the early Sebadoh material), it came as a surprise to hear that the Dinosaur Jr. founder ?is pretty laid back? and ?hilarious.? Then again, if Barlow and Mascis can reunite, anything can happen.

Witch?s debut has been dubbed as ?stoner rock? but sounds significantly less contrived than new albums by the likes of Early Man and The Sword. It?s more homage than an ironic retelling of the metal tale.

?I?m really happy with it. I think it sounds really good,? Thomas says. ?If I had had more time, it probably would have been a little more far out, but I like how it?s just straightforward. It is what it is.?

Rest assured, even if Feathers takes off, the unemployed Thomas says Witch won?t be a one-off. He wants to tour Japan. He wants to see the world. He wants to make music for life and these are the first projects that might attain his goal of self-employment through songs?whether those songs are heavy or quirk folk.