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New apartment in a week means new places to take my clothes off. I love it.
"girl" wrote:😆 I think I drank so much this weekend that my liver is going to write her congressman. But one thing that is super hilarious is calling a bartender "liquorsmith". For the entire evening.
This is going on my resume.
Waking up on the floor, a sofa and a table at the same time. Finding out that somehow my turquiose spice girls t-shirt has been mysteriously paired with a pair of bright red suspenders during the night. Thinking that’s the weirdest thing that’s happened in a day or two, until I find that I’m wearing female undergarments.
EDIT: and it has been brought to my attention that I called a bunch of friends and sang Wolly Bully.
Superpowers.
The other day I learned about the awesome superpower of having to poop whenever someone is about to go somewhere. Today I discovered another most amazing one, namely the superpowers of mums and younger sisters. There’s been a problem that I haven’t had any idea how to deal with, but today was the deadline of attending to it, and it turns out that mums and sisters have powers beyond my wildest imagination.
I was dreading this on so many levels, and it didn’t help that I’ve been the champion of hungoverdness today, but with the help of these superpowers it went great. The problem is by no means solved, but it’s atleast being attended to. And that was all I could hope for.Superpoopers!
I should let him know that a name has now been put to his disease.
Dude! This weekend, someone told me my bum smells like apples!
APPLES!I’m a little drunk right now but even you has to admit that’s funny.
ps and I like pikmin and the fact that now he is 2 of something and has cats. Cats that go woosh.
So Vermontians do like dogs and sniff eachothers bums as a way of greeting one another. That explains alot, and it also makes me slightly interested in travelling there sometime.
With my luck I’ll probably run into the guy on the left though, and I must be honest and admit that it could put a damper on the whole experience.
[img]http://bigtableacademy.com/Chan/images/I_Beat_Anorexia_T-Shirt.jpg[/img]Yes. When we are not greeting eachother by touching bums to shoulders, we perform the tried and true butt sniff. We are super awesome that way. If you have a face, you better bet your sweet bippy that a butt will soon be in it.
And oh my. I must’ve been drunk because I used the word "dude". With an exclamation point!
"girl" wrote:If you have a face, you better bet your sweet bippy that a butt will soon be in it.Promising.
I shall practice walking on my hands, it seems polite that people I meet won’t have to bend over to greet me. It also helps the whole bum on shoulder routine.I sure hope this shoulder bum greeting catches on because right now it is the funniest thing in the world to me. And it has to be your bare bum and your bare shoulder! So everybody will walk around wearing tank tops and chaps. Did you just say utopia? No, you didn’t. That was me.
Great. That means I have to practice walking on my hands, naked, which means that I’ll be looking at my dangling johnson.
Oh sweet imagery!
You could always wear a man thong. And no, when I am out shopping I most certainly do not venture over to the men’s department and lustfully gaze at the pictures of men in their undies on the packages of underwear.
Man thong, that’s simply not fair, can’t I use a girl thong ?
Of course you don’t, no need for that when you have three giant sized cardboard cut outs of male underwear models in your bedroom.
You most certainly can. But from what I’ve gathered, men bits tend to not want to stay in girl thongs. You would be surprised how much underwear I’ve gone through finding that out.
And I do not! And I definitely don’t set them up around my bed so it seems like they are staring at me and then touch myself in an erotic nature.
Well, you’re the seamstress of this here factory, could you fashion something out of a pair of girls thongs and other magical ingredients that’ll make sure my privates stay in place ? I am willing to pay in discarded lawnmower parts. Also money.
You don’t ? After getting the christmas card where you had them placed around the christmas tree and had dressed them in santa clothes I wouldn’t put it past you.
You just opened up a whole new avenue for my business! Making thongs for men and accepting lawnmower parts as currency! I have to admit I’m excited. Especially about the part when I take measurements.
And you know what is the funniest thing about me and cardboard cut-outs? I really did have one.
I took it to parties."girl" wrote:You just opened up a whole new avenue for my business! Making thongs for men and accepting lawnmower parts as currency! I have to admit I’m excited. Especially about the part when I take measurements.Fantastic ! I’m looking forward to recieving my modified girl thong modified by girl !
"girl" wrote:And you know what is the funniest thing about me and cardboard cut-outs? I really did have one. I took it to parties.Hahahaha !
I am not surprised, but I am ecstatic !
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