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Three women go to see a doctor. The first woman is asked to undress and the doctor notices an o-shaped mark on her chest. "What’s this?" he asks. She replies "My boyfriend went to Oxford and whenever we make love he wears his old university top".
The second woman comes in, is asked to undress and the doctor notices a c-shaped mark. "What’s this?" he asks. She replies "My boyfriend went to Cambridge and whenever we make love he wears his old university shirt".
The third woman comes in, undresses and the doctor sees an m-shaped mark and says: "Don’t tell me, your boyfriend went to Manchester." She replies: "No, my girlfriend goes to Warwick."why wasn’t Jesus born in Essex? They couldn’t find 3 wise men or a virgin.
how do you cut the English channel? With a sea-saw (thought Malc would like this one, he liked my last corny joke)
Have a great weekend kids.
Ben
Two Irishmen were in a lifeboat out in the middle of the Atlantic. A bottle drifts by. One of the chaps opens the bottle and a Genie pops out.
"Well guys, I am a genie, but I’m not terribly good. I can only grant you one wish."
The two Irishmen think for a long while before one pipes up. "Can you make the whole ocean turn to beer?"
The Genie replies "are you sure thats your wish?"
"Oh yeah," he replies
So the Genie dissapears and instantly the water in the ocean is replaced by golden lager. The two men look at their bounty before the other chap pipes up.
"You bloody bastard, now we’re gonna have to piss in the boat!"
a guy goes to the doctor and says "doc, i look horrible but i feel great; what’s going on?"
the doc says "well lets look in my book and see what it says.
so the doc flips through the pages, "look bad, feel bad; no, look good- feel bad; no, look bad- feel bad; no; Aha, here it is; look bad, feel good; it says here you must be a vagina <img> <img>
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