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Mass media = lowest common denominator (in most cases & unfortunately). Keep writing, curbdogma, if only for yourself.
TV: Greatest "Simpsons" movie moments
By On Jul. 24th, 2007
http://www.rochestercitynewspaper.com/entertainment/pop-culture/TV%3A+Greatest++Simpsons++movie+moments/”>http://www.rochestercitynewspaper.com/e … e+moments/
by Ryan StewartThis Friday "The Simpsons Movie" will hit theatres. But throughout the show’s 18-years-and-counting run (and think about that for a second: kids who were born when the show debuted are now about to be freshmen in college), the family has had more than its share of experience with the cinema. Here, then, are the 25 best "movies" in the show’s history, excluding actual films that existed in our universe as well.
25. "The Contrabulous Fabtraption of Professor Horatio Hufnagel" Sadly, I was unable to find a way to wedge "Stop the Planet of the Apes; I Want to Get Off!" in there, as it is actually a staged musical based on a movie, and not a film itself, but this is a decent replacement, even if it is only referenced by title and poster only at the end of the stellar "A Fish Called Selma" episode. The title cracks us up every time, particularly in context – Troy McClure opts to turn down his chance to play McBain’s sidekick so he can make this vanity project. 20th Century Fox is the studio gambling on its success.
24. "Mr. Smith Goes to Washington" (starring Mel Gibson) Gibson made a straight-up remake that most of Springfield found moving and eloquent at a sneak preview. The only holdout was Homer, who convinced Gibson to alter the ending to make it more violent. The result was pretty ridiculous, but Gibson doing the thing where he spins around on his head was funny.
23. "Young Jebediah Springfield" An educational film starring Troy McClure, this one is notable for its terrible production values (you can see a stagehand pushing the stuffed buffalo offscreen) and the line "A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man," one of the most cromulent lines in series history.
22. "The Stockholm Affair" When Homer is thwarted in his attempt to see "Look Who’s Oinking," he and Marge instead watch this political thriller in the Tom Clancy mold. Homer has some trouble following the drama until it dawns on him that he’s read a spoiler of the film’s twist ending, a detail he then shares with the rest of the theater.
21. "Ernest Goes Somewhere Cheap" A nice subtle joke here: the snooty Sideshow Bob, who would seem to favor more intellectual cinematic fare, laughs it up obnoxiously at the decidedly lowbrow Ernest film right after his parole. As a bonus, he and Marge share a spectacular exchange over Bob’s stalking of Bart.
20. "Love is Nice" This film, starring Julia Roberts, is ripped apart by Homer after he gets a crayon removed from his brain, which increases his mental capacity. Homer simply can’t understand why people could possibly like something so trite and predictable. Or why people can’t tell Bill Paxton from Bill Pullman.
19. "El Tango Del Muerte" There’s some good lines in this one, mostly about Eduardo the awesome dancer’s brother, Freduardo. "Where he died, I shall live: In his apartment."
18. "Honk If You’re Horny" We don’t see this movie at all, but the title is funny. Homer can’t actually watch it, because his quest for obesity in this episode has reached epic proportions and the movie theater cannot accommodate him.
17. "Hail to the Chimp" The title says it all: an ape is elected president. When his policies are accused of containing mostly partisan rhetoric, he jumps on his opponents’ heads and slaps them into submission.
16. "McBain: Let’s Get Silly" Rainier Wolfcastle stands in front of a brick wall, tells bad jokes, and then obliterates his hecklers. Reported budget: $80 million.
15. "The Terminizor: An Erotic Thriller" This was a screenplay written by Homer and conveniently left where Alec Baldwin, Kim Basinger, and Ron Howard can find it. Homer’s pitch: "It’s about a killer robot driving instructor who travels back in time for some reason." His best friend is a talking pie. Ron Howard sells Brian Grazer on it at the end of the episode.
14. "Leper in the Backfield" There’s only one clip here: Troy McClure goes back to pass… and his arm falls off. The filmography of Troy McClure mostly gets laughs just from when he rattles off their titles. Any actual footage that makes it into an episode is just a bonus.
13. "Cosmic Wars: The Gathering Shadow" A spot-on parody of "Star Wars Episode I," where aliens gather to discuss tariffs.
12. "Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie" Bart isn’t allowed to see this movie when it’s first released, but 40 years later, Homer lifts his embargo and Supreme Court Justice Bart and his father get to enjoy a scene where Itchy ties Scratchy to a set of train tracks, then attends and graduates engineering school so he can run over Scratchy himself.
11. "Homer S.: Portrait of an Ass-Grabber" One of two films depicting the "real-life" newsmaking incidents in the Simpsons’ lives. The first one, "Blood on the Chalkboard: The Bart Simpson Story," starred Neil Patrick Harris as Bart after he was wrongfully accused of murdering Principal Skinner. This more interesting one stars Dennis Franz as the alleged sexual harasser, Homer Simpson, in a nifty bit of stunt-casting. Franz sounds like he’s enjoying himself a little too much.
10. "School of Hard Knockers" Homer watches this as research for his collegiate stint, one he hopes will match what he’s seen in films like "Animal House" and this one, in which a popular, good-looking fratboy named Corey enlists a nerd to create a "bra-bomb" that will rain lingerie on the Dean during the President’s visit. Of course, the President thinks it’s great and appoints the youngster as his "Secretary of Partying Down."
9. "The Muppets Go Medieval" Troy McClure’s "latest film" for many years has him battling Kermit the Frog for the love of Miss Piggy. When Bart watches it, he mistakes Troy for a muppet made out of leather. Dyan Cannon has a small role.
8. "The Poke of Zorro" The jokes in the film that sent Homer on a dueling binge are funny, but with YouTube searches coming up empty at press time, it will be worth watching this on the eventual DVD release of Season 11 (possibly due later this year?) so you can freeze-frame on the credits and catch the even funnier jokes there, such as listing James Earl Jones as the voice of the Magic Taco and Pele as "Hiccupping Narrator."
7. "Scratchtasia" Roger Meyers, Sr.’s magnum opus is a direct parody of the "Sorcerer’s Apprentice" segment of Fantasia, in which Scratchy chops Itchy up into dust-sized particles that he then inhales. They re-animate inside his bloodstream and go to work from the inside out, all while a classical score plays.
6. "McBain" History remembers the McBain franchise-within-a-series as more of a parody of the supercop/supersoldier films of the ’80s like "Die Hard," "Rambo," or "Lethal Weapon," but the original looks like more of a gritty procedural like "The French Connection." The clip we see in the episode has that feel, at least, when McBain’s partner, one day from retirement, is gunned down by the goons of his archnemesis, Mendoza.
5. "The Bloodening" This is the movie the kids of Springfield sneak out to see at the drive-in when they break curfew. It’s a pretty silly parody of "evil children" horror films like "Village of the Damned," but it does include the line "We know that you and the bootblack have been rogering the fishwife in the crumpetshop."
4. "Meat and You: Partners in Freedom" Another educational film featuring big-time movie star Troy McClure, this contains some of the best material in the show’s seventh season. McClure’s cheery description of the "Killing Floor" and the examples of the food chain in action are highlights. All doubters will be labled "Grade A morons."
3. "Pukahontas" Barney’s entry into Springfield’s short film festival has heart, soul, and some surprisingly advanced special effects. This landed Barney the cover of Entertainment Weekly. But yet, we still feel compelled to place it behind…
2. "George C. Scott in ‘Man Getting Hit by Football’" Like the Academy in this episode, we are easily amused.
1. "Radioactive Man" Sure, we never got to see this as a completed product – we are left to assume that the movie did get finished in Hollywood, after Milhouse (as Fallout Boy) abandoned the production, the residents of Springfield took every cent the production had. But what they actually did shoot, or what they tried to shoot, leaves us with the impression that this would be a pretty kickass comic book superhero movie. The scene where Radioactive Man gets saved from an acid tidal wave would probably have been amazing had the producers not foolishly used real acid. It gets points off for the various production woes, but points added for being the only film that’s the subject of a full episode; a hilarious episode at that. It’s refreshingly devoid of mocking Hollywood convention or grandstanding, and instead full of the kind of inspired silliness we hope to see on the big screen come July 25.
D’OH!
Lu played a new song ("Honey Bee") last night that reminded me of Joan Jett. Sounded good. She also sang a cover of a cover: Richard Hell’s version of Fats Domino’s "I Live My Life" (bluesy). I think her next album (’08?) will have a different vibe from West.
What I’ve Learned: Homer Simpson
Nuclear-power-plant safety inspector, 39, Springfield
Interviewed by John Frink and Don PayneWhen someone tells you your butt is on fire, you should take them at their word.
There is no such thing as a bad doughnut.
Kids are like monkeys, only louder.
If you want results, press the red button. The rest are useless.
There are many different religions in this world, but if you look at them carefully, you’ll see that they all have one thing in common: They were invented by a giant, superintelligent slug named Dennis.
You should just name your third kid Baby. Trust me — it’ll save you a lot of hassle.
You can have many different jobs and still be lazy.
I enjoy the great taste of Duff. Yes, Duff is the only beer for me. Smooth, creamy Duff . . . zzzzzzzzzzzzz.
You can get free stuff if you mention a product in a magazine interview. Like Chips Ahoy! cookies.
You may think it’s easier to de-ice your windshield with a flamethrower, but there are repercussions. Serious repercussions.
There are some things that just aren’t meant to be eaten.
The intelligent man wins his battles with pointed words. I’m sorry — I meant sticks. Pointed sticks.
There are way too many numbers. The world would be a better place if we lost half of them — starting with 8. I’ve always hated 8.
If I had a dollar for every time I heard "My God! He’s covered in some sort of goo," I’d be a rich man.
Be generous in the bedroom — share your sandwich.
I’ve climbed the highest mountains . . . fallen down the deepest valleys . . . I’ve been to Japan and Africa . . . and I’ve even gone into space. But I’d trade it all for a piece of candy right now.
Every creature on God’s earth has a right to exist. Except for that damn ruby-throated South American warbler.
I don’t need a surgeon telling me how to operate on myself.
Sometimes I think there’s no reason to get out of bed . . . then I feel wet, and I realize there is.
Let me just say, Winnie the Pooh getting his head caught in a honey pot? It’s not funny. It can really happen.
Even though it is awesome and powerful, I don’t take no guff from the ocean.
I never ate an animal I didn’t like.
A fool and his money are soon parted. I would pay anyone a lot of money to explain that to me.
Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he’ll get a hook caught on his eyelid or something.
I made a deal with myself ten years ago . . . and got ripped off.
Never leave your car keys in a reactor core.
Always trust your first instinct — unless it tells you to use your life savings to develop a Destructo Ray.
When you borrow something from your neighbor, always do it under the cover of darkness.
If a spaceship landed and aliens took me back to their planet and made me their leader, and I got to spend the rest of my life eating doughnuts and watching alien dancing girls and ruling with a swift and merciless hand? That would be sweet.
I may not be the richest man on earth. Or the smartest. Or the handsomest.
Never throw a butcher knife in anger.
The office is no place for off-color remarks or offensive jokes. That’s why I never go there.
My favorite color is chocolate.
Always feel with your heart, although it’s better with your hands.
The hardest thing I’ve had to face as a father was burying my own child. He climbed back out, but it still hurts.
If doctors are so right, why am I still alive?
I’m not afraid to say the word racism, or the words doormat and bee stinger.
Always have plenty of clean white shirts and blue pants.
When that guy turned water into wine, he obviously wasn’t thinking of us Duff drinkers.
I love natural disasters because we’re allowed to get out of work.
When I’m dead, I’m going to sleep. Oh, man, am I going to sleep.
What kind of fool would leave a pie on a windowsill, anyway?
D’OH!
Lucinda Williams outdoors, on the grounds of FX Matt Brewery in beautiful downtown Utica, NY. An excellent show. Guitarist Doug Pettibone can play, and, of course, that girl can sing.
Rise to Your Knees
Meat Puppets
Anodyne RecordsWe’ve seen a rash of big names come out of retirement to take a swing at resurrecting the old glories. For most of the players in the reunion game — The Smashing Pumpkins, Dinosaur Jr., The Stooges, The New York Dolls — it’s been nothing but a matter of dusting off the old records and making a valiant attempt to return to the sound that made the legend.
For The Meat Puppets, things aren’t that simple. Unlike, say, the Pumpkins or Dino, the Arizona trio hasn’t enjoyed the sort of stability that makes firing up the reunion machine a simple clear-cut process. We knew exactly what to expect when Billy and Jimmy started jamming, and five albums set J., Murph and Lou on a pretty obvious course. The Puppets have none of that luxury of stability: Over its long career, the band bounced between hardcore, roots-punk, experimental attempts at synth-enabled rock, psychedelia and that brief stint as alt-radio mainstays.
That makes Rise to Your Knees a lot more intriguing concept than the notion of The Pixies or The Stooges play-acting their glory days to a new generation of fans. Rise to Your Knees isn’t entirely unpredictable as The Meat Puppets stick to the blend of country, psychedelic and American underground influences that, in varying amounts, served as the foundation for their sound. It’s just not an obvious attempt at formulaic nostalgia that seems to drive the reunion marketplace these days.
Rise to Your Knees revels in all things Meat Puppets, from the drugged-up hazy atmospheres and amp-shredding bursts of punky psychedelics to the shadow of twang that seemed to lurk just under the band’s surface for all its albums after II. Although the act sticks to the basics (Rise leans most toward Too High To Die’s pop simplicity), it’s a rare reunion that’s less about nostalgia and more about forging ahead. "Radio Moth" dumps shivering guitar synths into a sea of messy feedback and psychedelic guitar leads that sounds like Dinosaur Jr. was left in the desert to dry up and blow away. "Light the Fire" gets even more tripped out, with synths and an annoyingly Peter Frampton-like use of the wah pedal giving the punked-out track a truly lysergic feel. "Spit" delves into sugary power pop, "Tiny Kingdom" pulls out a banjo for some country pickin’ and "This Song" is an airy pop number.
The Meat Puppets had to claw their way through a back catalog that’s not made to be condensed and reformulated for an easy reunion. And if that makes Rise to Your Knees not as immediately recognizable or flashy as so many of the other back-from-retirement albums, it will at least leave you feeling that the Pups are back strictly to make music, not harp on long-lost glories.
– Matt Schild
"fata morgana " wrote:I’m going to try and get a copy of this album–since it seems highly recommended.Take it from a complete stranger, Fata, "Bolts" is superb!
"curbdogma " wrote:BTS, I haven’t heard two songs this good since the Pete Yorn singles I got. "Shining Somewhere" and "Sieze The Day" are perfect songs, and the track ramonesland is not so bad either. I really want to borrow free this release.Adam Franklin’s tunes so far are great, really. I never even heard his other bands.
I think King Tubby is our resident Swervedriver expert…I’m sure he can recommend AF’s earlier stuff…
"Bucky Ramone " wrote:…check http://www.zenorecords.com/”>http://www.zenorecords.com/ (the official Wipers / Greg Ginn web site)
they have the box set for only $17, highly recommended…….Just bought this for my birthday, but "ouch," got it from Amazon for more than $17 – –
Can I expect good things
(My expanding gut says "YES!" but I could use some reassurance… 
)"SG " wrote:Cool to hear he`s into country blues not many folks I meet know much beyond Robert Johnson about it"Now You Know" (2002) is a decent solo effort by Doug, SG. Worth a listen, if you haven’t heard it!
http://www.denverpost.com/headlines/ci_6407859″>http://www.denverpost.com/headlines/ci_6407859
Through misfortune, the music prevails
By John Wenzel
Denver Post Staff WriterWhen a band has been around as long as Built to Spill, nothing delivers a stronger reality check than a poke in the eye- sometimes a literal one.
The influential Northwestern indie-rock band, formed in 1993 by gentle, Neil Young-worshiping guitar hero Doug Martsch, has endured its share of misfortune, including the death of former band member Andy Capps last spring, weeks before the release of its new album "You in Reverse."
Then a detached retina, suffered during a game of basketball, rocked Martsch to the core.
"I could have easily gone totally blind," Martsch said recently from his home in Idaho. "When it first happened, my vision was horrible and I was super depressed."
The emergency surgery and recovery forced BTS to cancel its 2006 South by Southwest appearance. And though Martsch will never fully recover, he’s gotten used to the scar tissue on his retina, which sometimes causes double vision, limits his peripheral sight and makes reading difficult. "The doctor told me the brain adapts and makes adjustments, and just him saying that was a big leap for me," Martsch said. "I was able to deal with it a lot better."
The events leading up to the release of the long-awaited "You in Reverse" could have easily derailed BTS’s touring schedule, but fortunately the music prevailed. The group plays the Ogden Theatre on Friday night with the Boggs.
A lot was riding on "You in Reverse," the band’s first disc in five years. Martsch had burned himself out on music in general after 2001’s "Ancient Melodies of the Future."
"I felt like I didn’t really have much to offer," Martsch said. "I had to get my equilibrium back to be able to appreciate what I was doing."
Time, playing with friends outside of BTS, and a solo album and tour helped him center his priorities. Martsch professes to being more comfortable with himself these days – a good thing since his band’s famously busy road schedule cuts a wide swath across North America through October.
You would never suspect Martsch’s self-doubt from the audience, his jam-leaning solos and lockstep chord changes alternating with hurricane force. Dinosaur Jr.’s J. Mascis, a guitarist Martsch cites as a major influence, would be proud.
Credit Built to Spill’s lineup with its performance prowess of late. Bassist Brett Nelson, drummer Scott Plouf and guitarists Jim Roth and Brett Netson (of Caustic Resin) help Martsch balance his melancholy melodies and explosive chops, which have influenced everyone from Modest Mouse to Death Cab for Cutie.
"Each tour, we try to bring out a few songs we haven’t played before, and we do a certain amount of jamming on stage," Martsch said. "We haven’t had any major burnout so far."
Earlier this month the band released a two-song single ("They Got Away," backed with the Gladiators’ cover "Re-Arrange") and has been recording material for a new album, although Martsch doesn’t think it will see light any time soon.
Warner Bros. recently reissued BTS’s 1997 opus "Perfect From Now On," 1999’s "Keep It Like A Secret" and last year’s "You in Reverse" on vinyl, a rare move by a major label that thrilled record-collecting fans. Each was limited to 2,000 copies, remastered from the original tapes and repackaged in deluxe gatefold.
"I mentioned it to (Warner Bros.) because I wanted it to happen, and they really took off and ran with it," Martsch said. "I was really psyched."
In fact, Warner Bros. had wanted to re-release every BTS album as a vinyl boxed set to celebrate 10 years on the label, but Martsch said some of the band’s past labels were flaky (Up Records) or uncooperative (C/Z Records).
But nice as the reissues are, they’re just dressing atop the band’s core.
"I definitely feel we’re a better live band than anything," Martsch said. "We’re not in a hurry to do anything but play."
